March 20th, 2012

Hey you,

I think we know, don't we, that there is no going back from here? Neither of us has said as much, we may have vaguely alluded to it, skirted around the issue, and tentatively hinted at it, but I'm not sure there is anywhere left for us to go.

We had such a small time, yet we became so close I couldn't quite grasp it. I'm the worst of all things; a cynical romantic. I'm sure there is romance out there somewhere, I'm confident it exists, I'm just not sure that it has any relevance to me. You told me that I was special, you nearly made me believe it, and the fault lies with me that I couldn't take it in.

We're from different circles, you and I. You've told me we're not, but that's because you don't understand what I mean. Yes of course we have a similar upbringing, but it's what we've done since then that creates the chasm between us. You have fulfilled every dream, every promise, you have it all before you. I have failed at every turn, and disappointed myself. This is but one of the reasons this would never have worked between us. I like you so much I couldn't have endured your disappointment in me.

And yet...

In a different time, a different place, a different life, we would have met and loved each other with all of our hearts. Even now our minds mutually adore, and our hearts follow where our minds lead.

Even now.

Today, this is what I would tell you.

I adore you.

Take care xxx